I Have an Idea...

... remember that time when that Pheidippides dude ran all the way to Sparta and back?

Yeah, dude, that was awesome. We should do it, too.

Didn't he collapse and die?

I think so. It'll be awesome.

Dude, you're on. Last one there's buying the Old Style.

So, let's recap. Great story. Some Greek dude runs 26 miles, and collapses. Then idiots everywhere decide that it's cool to follow suit, paying $80 for the privilege to run themselves into exhaustion, delirium, and if they're lucky, death. After all, you gotta get your money's worth. So, this New York Times article is pretty funny, actually. Some of the highlights include:

“I had no faculties whatsoever,” said Dawn Dowell, who was among the injured, having blacked out at Mile 19.

Sweet. She sounds like most of the people I've talked to this weekend.

...doctors saw runners with core body temperatures as high as 107 degrees. At those temperatures, Dr. Lucenti said, people are stuttering and mumbling, unable to answer simple questions.

I wonder if a lot of people I meet have 107 degree body temperatures, because I see a lot of stuttering, mumbling, and the inability to answer simple questions. Of course, I teach an undergrad class. Maybe the thermostat's up too high in the classroom.

Brain cells may start to be destroyed when body temperatures are raised too high.

Perhaps this is an epidemic, because I think that I've seen a lot of folks with damaged brain cells lately.

Others, especially those who had trained for months and flown to town for the event, said they were angry, and kept running. Some recognized Mr. Pinkowski, the director, and yelled at him as he walked away from the central race area downtown, he said.

I think that continuing the race should have been mandatory. But there's nothing like yelling at someone who just shattered your hopes and dreams of being a world champion marathon runner... wait... nevermind. If you hadn't made it halfway when they called it, you weren't going to win anything, other than maybe your pride. Apparently, it takes a t-shirt to fulfill some of these marathon runners.

And to top it all off, in the women's race, apparently some chick pulled a Leon Lett:

Adriana Pirtea, a 27-year-old Romanian running in her first marathon, was waving her arms in triumph when, with 10 yards to go, the race favorite, defending champion Berhane Adere, a 34-year-old Ethiopian, caught her and flashed by.

How cool is that? Maybe I'll start watching more marathons. Of course, I'll be sure to have plenty of Gatorade. It can get pretty warm sitting there in the sun for so long. In fact, I may just go to the bar to have a couple beers and watch it on TV with the rest of the fans.

Or not.

-Chairman