Free The Waycross 9

I don't know much, but I do know that I'm proud of some very special and courageous third-graders down in Waycross, Georgia right now. In case you hadn't seen the article, "The Waycross 9" decided that enough was enough, and hatched an elaborate plan to deliver justice on behalf a compatriot who had been publicly shamed. This comes in advance of Swamp Fest in Waycross, evidently an annual festival that is traditionally highlighted by the killing of a local elementary school teacher.

These brilliant young minds, who had obviously watched a number of Law and Order and CSI episodes, devised an ingenious, multifaceted plan that efficiently divided labor. In comparison, the Jena 6 look like a bunch of mouth-breathers, whose plan was to jump a hillbilly and beat him up because he wouldn't let them hang out under a tree. On the other hand, The Waycross 9 plan included: disruption of enemy communications (drawing the blinds closed and putting paper over windows), initial assault (knock her out with a crystal paperweight), follow-up assault (stab with broken steak knife), prisoner security (handcuffs and duct tape), and post-op maintenance (cleaning up afterwards). Unfortunately, this plan was uncovered with Gestapo-like techniques. The ACLU is considering legal action on behalf the Waycross 9, suggesting the their rights to privacy were invaded.

Interestingly, some "experts" doubt that these kids would have succeeded. However, I have full faith in the youth of America. I believe that our children can attain any goal they desire. Other "experts" question whether the kids understood their actions. On the other hand, I fully believe that today's youth is more sophisticated, and has process more information than any other cohort in the history of mankind. Perhaps I am naive, but I am predispositioned toward hope, but our "experts" seem to be in the business of doubt. Additionally, these "experts" have obviously never watched either Lord of the Flies or, more recently, Kid Nation.

It is a travesty of justice that the Jena 6 walk free, while The Waycross 9 may face detention at recess, or even after-school detention. I urge you to call your local congressman, to call Jesse Jackson, and to call Nancy Grace and Oprah, and tell them to get the word out, that the world must know that we must "Free the Waycross 9."

-Chairman