Why Germans Love Open Wheel Racing

So, I've gotta say, I've always sorta like Formula One racing. They go fast, the cars look cool. And they have the best drivers in the world. And now I think that am a fan of their superior leadership, in the form of Max Mosley.

All I know is that anytime you hear the words "Nazi" and "sex scandal" in the same sentence, nothing but awesomeness can be the outcome. This ESPN article (based off of the London Times article, I think) describes the scenario. Apparently, the leader of F1 (who's 67 years old) is on tape being both a Nazi concentration camp prisoner and guard (I'm assuming at different times) in a "sadomasochistic orgy." I told you that nothing but awesomeness could follow.

First of all, homeboy's 67. If 40's the new 30, and 50's the new 40, then according to my math, using appropriate metric conversions and exchange rates, apparently 67's the new awesome. And, he's named Max Mosley. That just sounds pornographic. I have to say that I'm jealous.

Next, Spitzer's a chump. He's paying $2500 for Ashley Dupre to pretend that she's his girlfriend. Our boy Maximus got 5 prostitutes for $5000. And they had to act like Jews in a concentration camp, or Nazi guards. Tell me who's getting the better value. If you're keeping score at home, that's:

Formula One Racing - 1
State of New York - 0.

However, in fairness, the new Governor of NY seems to be pretty sweet, as well.

The best part is that Max's dad was the founder of the British Union of Fascists. I have to say that if I'm going to be in a union, that's the one that I want to be in. I don't want this lousy GEO crap that I'm paying dues for (yeah, apparently $100 gets taken out of my paycheck every year to fund a bunch of annoying flyers and other busy work that supports paying dirty, hippies in LAS that need people to fund them after they made the poor life decision of being an English or History or Women's Studies major). I want to be a part of a union that represents me.

-Chairman